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Wednesday, June 25th, 2003

Deeper Into Movies

Now you can not only cast your own movie, but find out it’s projected box office take and critical success. Here’s what it predicted for my magnum opus:

Requiem For A Flying Monkey (R)

(Adventure/Caper Comedy/Musical/Societal Satire)

Starring John Cusack and Naomi Watts

Also Featuring Christopher Walken, John Malkovich, Maggie Gyllenhaal, and Natalie Portman

Directed by Joel Coen

Screenplay by Steven Kloves and David Hayter

Projected Budget Range: $30-39 Million

Planned Release Date: May

Projected Box Office Receipts:

$11.79 million (Opening Weekend)

$61.72 million (Total Domestic Gross)

Chance of getting Oscar Nomination: 4%

Chance of winning at least one Oscar: Slim to None

Critic Most Likely to Praise: Ron Wells, Film Threat

Critic Most Likely to Skewer: Rita Kempley, Washington Post

At least I don’t lose money. Who is this Rita Kempley person? Who is she to criticize my life’s work? Obviously someone who can’t appreciate a good socially conscious musical caper adventure starring John Cusack, a couple cool creepy guys and a bevy of hot actresses, that’s who. I think it’d be a smash, myself.

To the surprise of absolutely no one, Pitchfork savages the new Liz Phair album.

Some more details about SARS-apalooza. The official site can be found here.

np – Steve Earle / El Corazon

By : Frank Yang at 1:23 pm
Category: Uncategorized
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  1. Kate says:

    Pop Noir (R)

    (Mystery/Paranoia/Music Industry/Societal Satire)

    Starring George Clooney and Nicole Kidman

    Also Featuring Joaquin Phoenix, Jake Gyllenhaal, Jennifer Connelly, and Rosario Dawson

    Directed by Rob Cohen

    Screenplay by Charlie Kaufman

    Projected Budget Range: $80-89 Million

    Planned Release Date: October

    Projected Box Office Receipts:

    $10.65 million (Opening Weekend)

    $59.72 million (Total Domestic Gross)

    Chance of getting Oscar Nomination: 9%

    Chance of winning at least one Oscar: 3%

    Critic Most Likely to Praise: Stephen Holden, New York Times

    Critic Most Likely to Skewer: The CAP Ministry, CAP Alert

  2. five seventeen says:

    Mr. Rifkin and Jean (PG)

    (Caper Comedy/Hostage Drama/Talking Animal)

    Starring Ben Stiller and Reese Witherspoon

    Also Featuring Rory Culkin and Cameron Diaz

    Directed by Peter Jackson

    Screenplay by Peter Jackson and Jeff Nathanson

    Projected Budget Range: $60-69 Million

    Planned Release Date: November

    Projected Box Office Receipts:

    $20.03 million (Opening Weekend)

    $126.50 million (Total Domestic Gross)

    Chance of getting Oscar Nomination: 15%

    Chance of winning at least one Oscar: 1%

    Critic Most Likely to Praise: Chris Gore, Film Threat

    Critic Most Likely to Skewer: Desson Howe, Washington Post